Fear the Crab

On the heels of my visit to the doctor for my suspected sleep apnea, I had to attend a mandatory “sleep class” at the hospital. My attendance had to be documented in order to proceed to the actual study, so that I assume the hospital can aver with reasonable confidence that I know what I’m getting into.

For a class, there wasn’t much to learn, nothing that I didn’t already know from my own internet research. I already knew how sleep apnea was caused, that any number of people can be affected by it regardless of their overall health and physique, and that a number of its symptoms can lead to very serious health risks. The class was scheduled for an hour and half, but the actual presentation only took 30 minutes; the rest of the time was for general questions or one-on-one conversations with the physician who gave the lecture.

In a way it was good that the class was so short. With a two-hour window between the end of my work day and the start of that class, I thought I could go home to freshen up and eat dinner. It turned out that traffic that day was Horrendous, so bad that I was forced to detour off my commute so that I could be at the hospital on time.

Since I qualified for a sleep study, I scheduled my appointment for the evening of June 1, which is a day after my little vacation (though I technically do attend work that day). I plan to take the next day off from work, just so I don’t have to rush around in order to be in on time.

When I think back on it, though, there are a couple of things I learned at that class. I discovered what the study will monitor as far as my vitals, such as brain waves, oxygen intake, blood pressure, and anything else they deem important enough to hook up electrodes and other gizmos to my body. I also learned that this granularity of data will be evaluated in 30-second increments, in order to give me the results with some level of accuracy. And if I do stop breathing during the study, the tech is going to wake me up and strap a CPAP machine to my head; likely to see what happens to me with it on.

The bathroom fixtures were finally installed. One more step closer to completion!

We went with Grohe because of reports of durability, and many positive reviews. And yeah, those pluses mean higher costs. The faucets are from the Talia line, with matching Volo handles. We didn’t install any type of aerator, so the water comes out quite strong. We’ll have to make sure we don’t waste any.

The sink

Inside the tub, we have a Grohe Tempesta handshower system, with Talia valve trim and tub filler. We found out that normally people have a fixed shower head, with a diverter to a handheld, but my bathroom never really had that feature to begin with. I don’t think I’ll be missing out.

The shower and tub

The toilet is a 1.6 gallon flusher, from Toto. Previously we had a 40-year-old behemoth that probably used upwards of 5 gallons per flush, 10 if you laid a real stinker. The new toilet seems much more powerful, at a fraction of the resources.

The toilet

I only wish that fraction extended itself to my wallet. I haven’t calculated how many flushes it would take to balance out the high price for the toilet, but I intend to sit on that throne until I am a dessicated shell of a man, held together only by sheer force of will.

And maybe constipation.

I’ve decided to create a new page to keep track of my workouts. It’s called Fear the BIG MAN! It is titled so because The Kosomot relayed some workout advice by a good trainer: When asked during his own workouts how he managed to get so strong, the trainer answered, “Pick up something heavy, and yell, ‘BIG MAN!'”

Of course, this advice was meant to get people to stop bothering the trainer when he wasn’t training somebody, but ever since then, Kos and I just keep yelling “BIG MAN!” every chance we get.

Even though it’s never whilst working out.

I didn’t lift today because I visited the doctor to see about a sleep study.  I believe I do suffer from some of the symptoms of obstructive sleep apnea. Among the typical signs of loud snoring and not breathing, I’ve experienced bouts of waking up in a sweat, headaches in the morning, problems with memory and concentration, and drowsiness during the daytime, particularly whilst driving.

I never really considered the latter as possible results of sleep apnea. I’ve always figured it was just because of a long day’s work, or the monotony of rush-hour traffic. In fact, I used to attribute my lapses of memory to just getting old or having too many details to memorize.

Perhaps it isn’t related at all, but it’s still good to check out. I don’t know when the clinic will call me to schedule a sleep date, but hopefully it will be on a weekend so I don’t have to miss work. And since I’m not very good at sleeping right away in strange and unfamiliar environments, the doctor prescribed a sleeping pill that I should take shortly before my appointment.

That single piece of sleeping agent cost me over $9.00. Even the pharmacist was a bit surprised that I was paying that much for one dang pill.

Ab Crunches
Cardio

It’s been one year since the big festivities that ushered in the new aspect of my life. Suffice to say, a lot has changed. I’ve used that time to work out a reasonable budget for day-to-day living, and I think we’re doing okay despite the weak economy. We’re not able to set aside as much money as we’d like, but we do what we can. I’ve also established a routine for going to work, handling the chores, and taking care of the general house. Not to say that I’m doing the domestic thing solo, but I try to do my part when I can.

The one thing that I’ve made less progress in is my exercise. I first started serious training back in January 2008, but after bowing out in late June due to prohibitive costs, I’ve tried to make do at home. I bought a small set of dumbbells ranging from pairs of 5 to 30 pounds, and used an inflatable exercise ball as a bench. With those I could do most exercises targeting specific areas, so I was happy. I also started working my way through a 100-pushup program, but really, I wasn’t making much progress.

This past February, I purchased a weight bench and barbell set. I’ve been hitting those weights pretty hard since then, three days a week, with rest in-between. I focus on specific areas on those different days; upper body one day, legs the next, back and abs the day after. Combining the dumbbells with the heavier weight plates really broadens my regimen, and I use the different exercises listed on Exrx.net for ideas and instruction. I don’t actually do all the exercises listed, but focus on the so-called “standard” series of core routines: bench press, squats, deadlifts, etc. I also like Stumptuous.com for further form instruction and inspiration.

Since late March, I’ve expanded my workouts to include a 5-day/week program of weighted ab crunches and 10-lb. sledgehammer swings with my Shovelglove. The crunches are meant to strengthen my core, of course, which is something that has been sorely lacking in my life. The sledgehammer is a mix of cardio and light strength-training, since it’s more about mimicking the activities of… well, shoveling, and chopping wood, and pounding fence posts, and cutting down trees. I figure, when the apocalypse rears its four ugly heads, I’ll be quite prepared in shoring up my home defenses.

Also since March, I’ve been taking the dog for a walk every weekday. I try to up the pace to a light jog, and towards that end I bought a new pair of Saucony running shoes. I started with a warm-up walk, jogged on the flats, and walked up and down the hills in my neighborhood, with the intent of building up to a full jog. Today, I was able to jog most of the way. I’m fairly certain the dog doesn’t mind the speed. Eventually I hope to go farther, on a continual run.

In the interest of maintaining this workout regimen of weights thrice a week, I’ve decided to post my progress here. This is by no means an indication of a new direction with this blog, but rather a new direction in my life of trying to be healthier and, ultimately, stronger. I’m tired of being a weak no-can-do-nothing, and hopefully there can be some accountability if I know that other people might be monitoring my progress.

Bench Press: 140@12, 145@10, 150@5
Dumbbell Fly: 30@10, 30@8, 30@8
Barbell Shrugs: 140@12, 150@10, 140@12
Sledgehammer Swings
Weighted Ab Crunches
Cardio

Yeah, the weight may not seem like much when compared to most men my age, but I basically started from nothing over a year ago. I couldn’t even do one pushup. Now I think the most I am able to do in one sitting is 50. That’s saying something for a year’s worth of on-and-off workouts.

Today the dog ate half a pizza while our backs were turned.

The Little Bitch

Continued ~

So far that I’m aware, this is a real product sold by a real company:
Petite Computer Desk from ComputerDesks.com

Seems pretty awesome, don’t you think? Or, you don’t see what’s so special? Let me enlarge it a bit, using the ComputerDesks.com’s in-house zoom feature:

No? Still don’t see it? Or maybe you do, but you just want some validation. Well, let’s have the knowledgeable little scamp in red “point” it out to you:

Cue music.

* * *

EDIT: One day after the discovery of this glorious find, ComputerDesks.com has updated the product picture. Clicking on the direct link above will show a tame version that I am sure many prepubescent boys are disappointed about. The pictures here, however, were screenshots of the product before the modification.

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned this, but I have been using a titanium spork at work to assist in the consumption of comestibles. I first heard about this thing via ThinkGeek and felt that it would serve me well in The Office environment. In a stroke of pure genius and total lack of work on my part, I managed to secure myself a titanium spork as a gift (along with a squishy bowl set, which I also use at The Office).

I use the spork practically every day. I pack a home lunch and drop that utility-ous utensil in the box, give it a quick spritz of dish soap to rinse off after lunch, and bring it home for a proper scrub at night. It’s very handy.

Sometimes I don’t bring lunch from home. I still bring my lunch box, because it has my squishy bowls and I use them for my breakfast of championship oatmeal. Those days that I don’t bring home lunch, I generally try to find something to eat from places around The Office, and in a passing fit of environmentalism, I opt out of the plastic forks in favor of my metallic culinary weapon.

Such was the case yesterday. Since I had to go to the bank, I stopped by a plate lunch place (located in the Biomedical Building… relevant?) and secured me some herb-roasted chicken. As mentioned, I took no utensils and resolved to use the spork. I’m doing my part to reduce my carbon footprint! Despite the fact that the lunch came in a styrofoam container and that my feet are kinda small.

Fast forward past a fantastic serving of fowl, and the rest of the day is frapturously dull. So dull that I can make up words like frapturous, because it rhymes with craptastic.

I go home, open up my lunch box so that I can wash my bits, and I realize that I FUCKING LEFT THE SPORK IN THE PLATE LUNCH CONTAINER. The container that I threw out in the large garbage cans outside The Office building, that I now distinctly remember having no other such garbage so as to land directly at the bottom. The bottom of which undoubtedly has filled up since I dumped my container after lunch and only realized the spork was missing after dinner.

I figure, well hey, it’s only nine (8.99) dollars, plus shipping and handling. Yeah, it was a gift, but shift happens sometimes. On the other hand, it was 9 freakin’ dollars (plus s&h) and it was a freakin’ gift! Shift!

As if I didn’t have anything better to do, I stayed up late fretting about it.

This early morning I arrive at work, and it’s raining. I have my raincoat and lunchbox (sans spork) and I’m splashing through puddles as I make my way from the parking structure to The Office. I arrive at the building and stop at the garbage can. The garbage can that I threw away my food in. The garbage can that has been filled with other food containers since I left yesterday.

It’s still dark, as it is not yet time for the sun to wake. And it’s raining. Hard. I peek into the can (it has no lid) and see that yes, it is now halfway full. As I suspected, yes, there are food containers, likely filled with leftovers that invariably attract my #1 nemesis (see tags for a clue). And yes, I can see the corner of the container that I threw out from where I stand, pale white styrofoam gleaming in the baleful orange glow of outdoor hallway lights.

Huh. You know, I could reach in there and get it. The can, can be considered halfway empty, right? And the spork was a gift, right? So what if there are dozens of other plates and containers in the way. So what if I have to navigate past all that rotten food and who-knows-what in open bags. So what if, assuming I do pull out the container I used, there is another “occupant” inside when I open it.

I stand there, over the garbage can, pondering my decision. I stand there in my black raincoat, large hood over my head, backpack on my shoulders, lunch box in my hand. I stand there in the dark, rain and wind falling around me, utterly alone since no one with any semblance of sensibility is up at this forsaken hour.

“Lo, how the mighty have fallen,” a witness might think. “Lo, how the dying throes of a weakened economy force State employees to forage for food.” Well, fuck it. I dropped my lunch box to the ground, and dove into that can with as much courage as I could muster.

Apparently it wasn’t much courage, because I ended up just sticking one sleeve-rolled-up arm in there and tugged at the barest piece of styrofoam real estate with my thumb and forefinger. My other fingers were trying as hard as possible to stay away from the germ-ridden filth. My chin was parked on my shoulder blade in an attempt to avoid possible backsplash from.. well, anything.

But it was okay! And my hand was already making the OK sign! I pulled out that lunch container, gave it a quick shake to dislodge any residue, and popped the lid open before my rational mind could interrupt.

Voila! Spork! Disregarding any previous attempts to remain sanitized, I snatched my precious out from the grasp of day-old rice and chicken fat, and dumped the container back into the can. I went inside The Office to the break room sink and gave it a quick rubbing down with dish soap and water, then I microwaved a mug of water and dropped the business end of the spork into it, where it has been soaking since I started this post.

I think maybe it’s okay now. It’s time for oatmeal, and I’m hungry.

In a recent conversation with The Galbraith, we waxed poetic about the philosophies and inter-relations of Weight Watchers, miniatures gaming, window shopping, and Star Wars.  In a wave of nostalgia, I was reminded of my childhood fascination with a particular vinyl album, hidden amongst the remnants of my parents’ music library of John Denver and other artists of the time, that I would listen to repeatedly for hours at a time. This record album was full of Star Wars music.

The record album contained John Williams’ signature Star Wars pieces, such as the intro and ubiquitous cantina song.  It filled me with great excitement each time I dropped that needle into the first groove and cranked up the hi-fi.  With each song, I could relive the space opera experience scene by scene in my mind’s imagination.

I don’t remember what year it was produced, but it was after the explosive introduction of the Star Wars phenomenon, so definitely after 1977.  I had absorbed the initial movie with fervor, I built X-Wings out of Tinkertoys (I had the wooden version), I collected action figures (and promptly tore them out of the packaging, much to my 20/20 hindsight’s chagrin).  I wanted anything and everything related to Star Wars and I wanted it every day.

Apparently, I wasn’t very discerning about what I got.  This is the album of which I speak:

Star Wars and Other Galactic Funk, by Meco.

Here’s a sample.  There are probably other samples out there, but that link is among the first few a casual web search returned.

I was naive, and had no idea was a “tribute album” was, much less the practice of DJs remixing and repackaging material for funky beats. I conveniently ignored the wacky cover and focused on the name, “Star Wars.” I heard the familiar tunes and thought nothing out-of-place with the disco rhythms. I dare say that I was frickin’ PROUD to own that album!

So much so, that I brought it in to show-and-tell one day and forced the whole class to listen to it.  I remember standing up there in front of the room holding the album cover, ramming that visual down everybody’s throat, as the gyratory music-ations blared over the teacher’s record player (yes, I think record players were standard teaching material back then).

What I don’t remember is how everyone reacted to it.  I think I might be suppressing that memory, but I have a pretty good idea what the teacher must have been thinking.

And you know what?  I think I may still have that record.  Somewhere.

It’s all starting to come together!

Day Six of the bathroom remodeling actually took place Christmas Eve, when the new cabinets were installed.

Bare cabinets

The old countertop was removed, hence the traces of glue and paper backing against the wall.  That little block under the mirror is just to hold the whole thing up, since before it was resting on the backsplash.  What’s new with this countertop are the extra shelves to the left to give us more storage space, while still retaining a bit of leg room in the vanity area (not that any of us actually used that area for vanity purposes).

Day Seven was today, when the Corian countertop and shower walls were installed.  The nice-ness is freakin’ awesome!

Corian shower walls

Corian counter and sink

The shower walls go all the way up to the ceiling and lie flush with the window, ensuring a somewhat-secure seal. The installation couldn’t wrap into the window frame given the way the hardware was designed, so this is the next best thing.

The sink is part of the counter top, making it a smooth transition that will be easy to clean.  We also requested that the backsplash be made “one-piece” with the counter so that no water can stain the grout.

The plumber has already been notified that the fixtures can be installed.  We’ll also get a nice finish of dark-colored Formica placed on the cabinets, for a contrast against the light-colored counter and walls.  As for the floor, we’ll probably install the same design so that it matches the rest of the house.